It works like GPS: know where you are, know where you’re going, then figure out the route.
Whenever I meet people, especially young people, I end up asking the same kind of questions. What do you want to make out of life? Where do you see yourself in five years? What do you have right now that you can use? It’s not small talk. It’s the same process I use for myself. And it all comes down to a simple metaphor: GPS navigation.
Think about how GPS works. First, it needs to know exactly where you are. Then it needs to know where you’re going. Everything else, the route, the turns, the recalculations when you miss an exit, flows from those two things. You can take multiple paths to the same destination. You can hit traffic and still get there. But if you don’t know your starting point or your destination, you’re just driving blind.
Building your life works the same way. You need to know where you are. You need to know where you’re going. And then you need to be honest about how to get from one to the other.
Step 1: Know Exactly Where You Are
This is the part most people skip, or lie about. You have to take stock of all the variables at your disposal. Are you rich or poor? Do you have networks? An uncle who can open a door? A country that supports your dream or one that doesn’t? You need to know exactly what you have, because sorry to say it: there are some things that will not work in your case if you don’t have the right predisposition.
If you’re born in Nigeria and you want to compete in F1 racing, your first move had better be: How do I leave this country? Nigeria somply doesn’t have that ecosystem right now. There’s probably a Nigerian in F1 but I bet he wasn’t raised in Nigeria.
The context matters. So you have to be brutal about context. What’s your health like? Your family situation? Your access to capital, information, mentors? Don’t be shy. If you’re rich, acknowledge it. If you have connections, use them. If you don’t, admit it. The point isn’t to feel bad. It’s to stop pretending so you can make a plan that actually works.
I wanted to study medicine. If I’d gotten medicine at the University of Benin, I might have stayed back in Nigeria. But I didn’t. I got physiotherapy. I didn’t want to waste time fighting to transfer or waiting for another shot. I’d already seen how hard it was to get into medicine in Nigeria and how many years they spend studying. So I said: I have to leave the country. That was the only way the life I wanted was going to be possible. Most people thought I was crazy. When it worked, they came around. So assess yourself. Repeat it over and over. And don’t be shy because if you don’t use what you have, someone else will.
Step 2: Know Where You’re Going
There are two ways to do this. You can have a general sense of where you’re headed: a direction, a vibe, a “I want to do something in tech” or “I want to help people.” Or you can have a specific goal: I want to build a company that serves 10 million learners; I want to be a surgeon in this hospital by forty. Both are valid. But there’s a trap with specific goals: when you hit them, you can get depressed. You’ve been running toward something for years. You get there. Then what? Easiest solution is to just set a new goal but it is not exactly easy especially if you have chased the initial goal for so long.
So a lot of people talk about having an infinite goal, a “why” that doesn’t have a finish line. Simon Sinek made this famous: Start with Why. The idea is that you don’t just want “to be successful.” You want “to create a world where every young person has access to quality education.” That kind of goal doesn’t run out. You can hit milestones along the way, but the direction stays.
So ask yourself: do I have a target, or do I have a direction? And is that direction something I can keep walking toward for a long time?
Step 3: Plot the Route: Forward or Backward
Once you know where you are and where you’re going, you have two ways to plan.
Forward: I have this. I’ll do this next. Then this. And I’ll see where it takes me.
Backward: I want to get here. So before that I need to be here. And before that I need this. So what do I need to do now?
For example: I want to build a billion-dollar company. The only realistic path might be a tech product that scales globally. So I need to learn to build, to ship, to raise money. So right now I need to learn X, Y, Z. You’re fitting the pieces backward from the destination. Both approaches work. Some people are more comfortable starting from today and stepping forward. Others work best by defining the peak and backfilling the steps. Use the one that fits your brain. But use one.
Be Realistic About Time and Advantage
The more resources you have, the less time it usually takes to achieve something. So you have to be optimistic but grounded about timelines. I used to be delusional. I’d put myself on a pedestal, assume I had more money, more time, more leverage than I did. It felt good. It also led to plans that didn’t work.
So yes, look at your future and say: this is what I want to achieve. But also run the numbers. What would it take, given what you actually have? How long did it take people who started from a similar place? That’s not to kill your ambition. It’s to make your plan real.
And here’s another way to think about it. Don’t just compare yourself to people who’ve “made it.” Compare yourself to yourself or if you can’t help it, yourself to a version of those people that might fit in your current shoes. If someone started with nothing and built something, measure the multiplier. They had 5 and made 25, that’s 5x. If you started with less, you don’t get to say “they had it easier.” You get to say: what can I build with what I have? The point, also, isn’t to shame anyone. It’s to use your advantages without guilt. Someone else’s 5x with less should motivate you to do more with more, not to downplay what you have.
Decide What Kind of Life You Want
Not everyone wants the same thing. Do you want to be chill? A go-getter? Do you want a family early or a career first? Do you want to stay in one place or move every few years? There’s no single “right” life. But you have to decide what’s important for you. Otherwise you’ll keep reacting to other people’s definitions of success and wonder why you’re exhausted. So put it together: where you are, where you’re going, how you’ll get there; and what kind of life you want while you’re at it. That’s the structure. The rest is execution.
So when I ask people what do you want to make out of life? I’m not just making conversation. I’m asking them to do what I try to do every day: find their position on the map, set their destination, and start moving. You can always recalculate.
But you have to start with the two coordinates. Where you are. Where you’re going. Everything else is route.